Study abroad: First time writing about love
Her eyes were swollen. Maybe she was crying last night. He does not look straight into my eyes as if to hide his swollen eyes. And you finally message me: "You said goodbye to him last night then you ..."
I am kindly heartening to read your message. Because I understand that feeling better than anyone else. The love of international students. Those who struggle and try hard to keep their love away from each other half way round the earth. It is not possible to be happy at the side of each other, as there is no hand to protect, the memory of when the distance is too large and do not know how long you can nourish this love. But it will also drop midway because the idea is simple. Very teary and teary like no one else letting go. He reminds me of my story and him. The story is associated with the assassination and struggle in me about the days holding hands but afraid of the distant.
I know you are just like a friend and I also share that I will make a profile to study in the United States. He laughed while holding his hand and told me he was glad to know that. I hope both of you will have a better future and you are still here, trying to study and grow day by day waiting for me. I find myself lucky to meet him, not selfish to hold me back but he thinks of the farther things, the better for the two. He reminded me to exercise and learn every day so that when away from home can take care of themselves. I think I have found the right people, who always cheer and support me to pursue my dream of studying. He is also in the process of building a career so we do not have much time for each other. Sometimes I even break up as if my companions were together in the pursuit of youth to pursue my passion, rather than my lover like many other young people. We are passionate about our work and can sacrifice dating for him to work and I try to learn English to prepare for interviews at the consulate.
Once, he whispered to me that "going to school is good for me". I did not dare look straight into his eyes, turned away and laughed and joked "you go to get married in America always". At that time I turned away because I did not want him to see my eyes are wet. But back when I saw his eyes are also blurred. It's true that I'm "just good at bullying you". I'm not afraid of the day when people call it love. I'm not a bum, but I'm angry. But it is only he can tolerate the childishness to the extent that it is difficult. How often do he up and down, I just get a "wait baby and then I talk". The day I told him I was making a case study abroad. He quietly said nothing. Sitting next to each other, we just talk about things when I go to study abroad, how will I be, how to study, and what will he stay behind. He said I do not cry, go to school is a good thing, must train myself more, try more to come back to my country will have many better opportunities.
The day I passed the interview, I informed you that I know. You see and only ask when I go. Perhaps the joy of being visa-issuing visa officer broken how much, it is also my time to be very busy. My heart is confused, it really knows the joy that I hope and pursue how long it is when I have to answer my lover about the day I left him. From that time until I was on the plane, he went to work in the remote, we like to learn to love far away from those days. These are scary days. I use all my inner strength to say goodbye to you. I cried so much that how many tears poured out without space. And I dare not tell you. I just wish he was doing well and I would like to go. I do not want you to wait for me because maybe that time will be long, long. Even I myself do not know exactly how much but I know because of you I will come back. Just to see him happy because of his efforts whether it is me or not.
Two more days I will fly, you return to the city and meet me. In a short time, I cried a lot, I did not dare to look at those eyes again. He hugged me in his arms and smiled "Do not cry, go to school in America is good, baby try to live better now, home, he will also try to be like baby." You still are, still mad with your passion and I believe you will do it. He did not send me to the airport as the day I fell in love with him. Because I have to be bigger to realize that sometimes it is not far apart because of love but because we have thought for each other.
We are still working on each other's dreams, but love is still there. I'm still happy to see you happy and happy. This life, thanks to him, I understood many things and realized "love one person is not only words, but also need sacrifice for each other, pursue the dream of life together." Although I am far away from you halfway around the world, even when I am writing this line, you are in sleep, I wish you always happy and more successful. I will return, not necessarily to compare with him, but to see him - who helps me to see my weakness and push me up every day - be happy.
The love of young people are international students, passionate, passionate but also many trade-offs. That girl, my age and also my feelings before. I love you as yourself of the old days. I only know to tell you that if you still consider each other happy, try to keep loving, do not let later regret. Because that's what I do not understand when in the position like you are now. Love is just tired, but if you believe enough and love, it will make you more confident and try harder. I understand better that "dreams and love are never enemies, they will support each other so that you can achieve both." So, if you are an international student, are in love, please continue. It will help you warm and more motivated when faced alone with so many difficulties in the land. If one day the feeling is cold, it will go away, do not force yourself to give up, will always leave in the heart of a wound trade name.
Thank you for giving me the motivation to write these sharing words.
[Student's diary from Houston, USA]
Houston, 9 June, 2017
Address: 21 Mai Thi Luu, Dakao Ward, District 1, HCMC
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